Are you born again?
I am asking you since I didn't know this question to pose to my 17-year-old self. I only knew that I believed in Jesus and wanted to be a Christian. But did I know Him?
I was baptised at 17. My parents had set me free to decide my religion (a kind of freedom they never had in their own lives); they never pushed me to choose their (non-Christian) religion or adopt their own beliefs - they just wanted me to be a good person. "What matters is inside your heart - that you never hurt another, lie to them or hurt their humanity and personhood in any way." This is how they raised me.
At 20, I went around saying that I was a Christian - but I was a false convert: my Christianity was one of convenience - it gave me a church to go to whenever I felt for it or had a problem, and a God to remember or blame whenever things went bad [These people honour me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me (Matthew 15:8)].
At 23, I identified as a scientist (with professed research and writing skills) and my "faith" was shaken: the "scientific" ideologies which I looked up to didn't take my religion seriously; you could believe in whatever you want (the creation), as long as it was not the God of the Bible [The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork (Psalm 19:1)]. I was surrounded by the thought that people who believed in the Bible were fools, they had an outdated worldview imposed by some select few that didn't know any better. I feared humiliation and rejection from my community so much that I left my Christian views to seek a more "sophisticated" interpretation of life [But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first (Revelation 2:4)]. Everyone told me to find God in my heart, and so I trusted them [The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? (Jeremiah 17:9) - It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man (Psalm 118:8)].
In time, it became unclear to me why I should follow these moral standards; so, I "followed my heart" and spread my ignorance to the world, fearing rejection more and more - this is only logical when your world is shaped by "scientists" (who change their minds once in a moon) convincing you that this is part of yourself: the unproven hand of evolution has set us all in a "survival of the fittest" mode. It took me several years of incredibly foolish behaviour, my unexplained suicidal thoughts (my life was getting better every day, as opposed to my depression) and a remarkably hard slap from life to wake me up and make me realize how far astray I had gone; this was the worst and best thing that ever happened to me. Life can be incredibly hard - I have known this since my childhood - but sometimes unexplainably so.
People like the willfully blind "scientist" me, believe that the Biblical God is not real because this justifies breaking His (and their) moral law; they attack and blur the human conscience because it warns against - and accuses - their misdeeds constantly. But believing alone is not enough: their mission is to convince as many as possible - especially the young generation - attacking and ridiculing in the process whoever does not agree with their worldview (as if this is a great novelty in human history); it seems that the more the voices in their head, the number their conscience. But the bitter truth is we cannot deny our misdeeds: claiming ignorance of the law is no excuse - ignorantia juris non excusat [They show that the requirements of the law are written on their hearts, their consciences also bearing witness, and their thoughts sometimes accusing them and at other times even defending them. (Romans 2:15)].
Real scientists don't strive to disprove a God that they don't believe in and ridicule His believers - rather, they admire an understanding they don't have. They are not blind to the intelligence of God and His design behind everything - rather, they try to understand Him [I want to know how God created this world. I'm not interested in this or that phenomenon, in the spectrum of this or that element. I want to know His thoughts; the rest are just details (Albert Einstein, 1925)]. True scientists don't deny the truth, they try to understand it; they don't dogmatically accept (and certainly don't expect that others faithfully do) what they can't prove, they explore the fascinating conceptions of the unexplainable world [The human mind is unable to conceive of the four dimensions, so how can it conceive of a God, before whom a thousand years and a thousand dimensions are as one? (Albert Einstein); This most beautiful system of the sun, planets and comets, could only proceed from the counsel and dominion of an intelligent and powerful being. This Being governs all things, not as the soul of the world, but as Lord over all (Isaac Newton, 1687)]. True scientists are led by the light of God's creation - not by the darkness of their ego [Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools (Romans 1:22)].
People like the falsely converted "Christian" me, do things to others that they dread others will do to them, and create a functional god who would forgive everything they do. They do nice things not because they repent and turn to Christ, put God above all and contribute to a moral word, but because they think that in this way God will be tricked into letting them go free and forget their sin at no cost; they think they can say "never mind I hurt so many, look how much good I've done!" and get away with it. Without realizing it, in their attempt to deceive and bribe God, they worsen their situation. This is nothing different from others - it makes Christianity a common religion and the cross just another symbol.
But God sees our hearts, He knows whether we chose goodness because of our love of righteousness or whether this is part of our effort to wash away our sin. God cannot be deceived; but people are. Ultimately, they fight against a Christianity they didn't really know.
I'm not happy about it, but I was this person: like the rooster, I puffed up my pride more and more every time to numb the feeling of His wrath upon my head. My functional god would never hurt my feelings and always forgave me no matter what I did; I rejected as religious fanaticism all aspects of Christianity that did not satisfy my ego [The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that its works are evil. (John 7:7)]. The Lord of my mind did not allow me to think ill of myself and correct my character - he always justified and praised me for "doing my best." Above all, my actions didn't define who I was as a person. I didn't take either God or His moral law seriously. And I felt not the slightest sense of responsibility for my misguided interpretation - as shaped by a secular worldview. Above all, I trusted my own goodness [And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith (Philipians 3:9)].
The Bible says the wages of sin is death [Romans 6:23]; and even though my family walked so many times through the valley of the shadow of death [Psalm 23:4], I chose to remain blind (even to the fact that we will all die after all). And, while He was justified to take everything, He was always patient and merciful, giving as many chances as I needed to turn to Him [But thou, O Lord, art a God full of compassion, and gracious, long suffering, and plenteous in mercy and truth (Psalm 86:15)]. The Bible says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom [Proverbs 1:7a]: if Adam and Eve had feared God, they wouldn't have dared to doubt His word and take it upon themselves to even look at the fruit of sin, let alone eat it; if I had feared God before, I wouldn't have dared to doubt His word and take it upon myself to even think of a lie, much less say it, or say His holy name in vain, or call my neighbour an "idiot, fool", or criticize my brother according to the smallest of his mistakes, or create my own version of God, or dishonour my parents, or, or... [Matthew 5-7].
I bet no one (unless deadly desperate or mentally ill) would agree to sell their eyes or hands - no matter how high the price. Yet Jesus Christ says if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell [Matthew 5: 29-30]. He says, fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell [Matthew 10: 28].
But we close our ears to this warning; we think His mercy will last forever: we are so deceived we won't even accept that our wrongdoings make up our identity - visible to everyone but to ourselves: whether we admit it or not, telling lies makes up a liar; taking something without permission (irrespective of its value) makes up a thief; wanting to "bed" someone even though there is no chance for it makes up an adulterer at heart (Matthew 5:28); using the name of God in vain makes up a blasphemer; letting oneself be driven by sexual desires makes up a fornicator; worshipping a false god makes up an idolater; hating someone to the point you wish they didn't exist makes up a murderer at heart [Matthew 5:28 - Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God (Romans 8:6-7)]. Ironically, we never forget the mistakes of others.
We consider that a Holy God that does not allow sin to dwell with Him [Psalm 5:5], is obligated by nature to let us partake in eternal life. We quote His mercy, but would we expect a fair Judge (Isaiah 33:22) to equate lawbreakers acting sorry for their crimes with those who saw their wicked acts and truly repented (where would the mercy for the latter be - what would be different in the Kingdom of God then)? Pointing in pride at others we are able to see their faults believing that we merit the earth because we're always better. But the criteria of our judgement won't be based on others - but on the law we broke [Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9-10)].
This is why we need to repent and turn to Christ to be born again. This is absolutely rational from a legal perspective: the lawmaker is bound by the law under all circumstances; and the law has to be satisfied through the punishment of criminals: no one is above the law - otherwise the law is not fair. There was only one way death (punishment) could be defeated for (the law-braker) humanity: through the blood (payment) of a sinless man who could satisfy the law for our sins and show us the way to salvation through paradigm. All human beings have broken the moral law.
The law could only be fulfilled if one of us (flesh and blood) was not only sinless but whose existence was itself a contradiction to sin - He was born from an act of Grace [I am the living bread which came down from heaven: if any man eat of this bread, he shall live for ever: and the bread that I will give is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world (John 6:54)]. Only God in flesh could overcome humanity's love for sin and open the way for us to see the truth [I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me - John 14:6)]. Only the lawmaker could make way for a heavy payment, to be given as a free gift to the truly sorrowfull criminal [For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counseller, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6 - Old Testament)]. In His Word (Isaiah 53), He suffered in flesh to fulfil the law: it is finished! [(When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost (John 19:30)].
We know He was sinless because it was impossible for death to hold him (Acts 2:24): all men are born in sin, live in sin and all die in sin sooner or later - death holds them. Only God has no sin and can suppress death to reveal and give eternal life to those who accept and follow Him, willfully offering their lives to Him as He offered His Life for them: I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. If ye had known me, ye should have known my Father also: and from henceforth ye know him, and have seen him. Philip saith unto him, Lord, show us the Father, and it sufficeth us. Jesus saith unto him, Have I been so long time with you, and yet hast thou not known me, Philip? he that hath seen me hath seen the Father; and how sayest thou then, Show us the Father? (John 14:6-21)
Accepting the sacrifice of Christ, God's spotless Lamb [Behold, the Lamb of God that takes away the sin of the world (John 1:29)] means to see how corrupt we are: not others, but we, who compose the world make the world a wicked place by willfully blinding ourselves to the truth of our misconduct. It means to deny ourselves [Matthew 16:24] be born again in spirit and turn from our sins [Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God - Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit (John 3:3-6)].
I do not speak of that which I have not witnessed: He lit the light of His Truth within the darkness of my being. He humbled my heart and showed me that I have no chance before the Holiness of God [Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God (Mark 18)]. I couldn't explain where I had grasped that cynicism to think I could save myself when God had made His law clear to me and I willfully broke it - that would be as unreasonable, indeed, as saying "I don't need a parachute, my plan is to flap my hands and fly, I believe in the mercy of the law of gravity!" He will apply the law unto me, and before the law there is no salvation [For as many as have sinned without law shall also perish without law: and as many as have sinned in the law shall be judged by the law (Romans 2:12)].
But I have His grace to cite; when you trust and follow Jesus as Lord (don't play the hypocrite - He cannot be deceived) the law is satisfied; death is defeated. He gives you His heart and the Spirit of God; your trials are His trials [There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)], and nothing can go against God [Romans 8:31]; you are free, for what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh: That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit [Romans 8:3-4].
This is the meaning of the Cross for Christians; and it fills their heart with sorrow, gratitude and joy.
As a born-again, you seek righteousness not because it washes away your sins but because it honours the name of your Father [But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name: Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God (John 1:12-13)]. You cannot be proud of yourself - you know what you've done and the paths that pride has taken you before [Not of works, lest any man should boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them (Ephesians 2:9-10)]. You are not the good one - He paid the heavy price of your sins; He gave you life where you deserved death; the glory is in His name.
As born-again Christians, we thus trust Him because His grace alone saved us [For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. (John 3:16)]; we serve others and offer our lives for the world, as He did.
Once blinded by our sin, we have mercy for the blind and try to bring them to light with the forces and opportunities that He gives us [And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins; Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience: Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others (Ephesians 2:1-2)].
The world sees us steadily turning from selfishness to become people that have overcome their pride as all-deserving and all-knowing, and that have humbled themselves before the Word of God - this is the basis of Christianity [I praise You, Lord of heaven and earth that You have hidden these things from wise and learned, and revealed to little children (Matthew 11:25)].
So when you are asked "Are you a Christian?", pause a second and realise the responsibility you carry with your answer. If you're still not sure - thinking you're a good person and your own righteousness will save you in the end - save this faith from having to deal with the effects of false converts and tell the truth. Humble yourself by reading the Gospel, repent and trust in Him - then, as a born-again, you will know the difference.
By a Christian who was born again
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